Proven Performance

“Alright Jenkins, we need to put out a new ad campaign for our line of batteries, so show me what you’ve got.”

“Of course, sir. We’ve designed the new battery just like you wanted us to. We’ve had a team of top-notch graphic designers work on the logo and colouring for months. It is very flashy and eye-catching.”

“..And?”

“Sorry, sir?”

“What about the tests? How did it perform?”

“It did.”

“Excuse me?”

“It did, sir.”

“I’m…I’m not sure what you mean by that, Jenkins.”

“Well, sir, you asked us to test the performance of the batteries. So we asked ourselves, what is the most common use for our product? The answer: a remote control. Our team of researchers then popped in two of our AA batteries and tested to see if the batteries worked. They did.”

“Um, ok, slightly unorthodox, I suppose, but does the trick. What about the competition?”

“They also worked, sir.”

“You’re losing me, Jenkins.”

“You also asked us to test our competitor’s batteries performance, right? Our researchers also put those batteries into the remote. The remote still worked with those batteries.”

“That’s it? That’s all you have for me??”

“I don’t understand, sir. We did everything you asked.”

“I wanted to know HOW the batteries performed, Jenkins! Do they last longer? Run faster? Be...better batteries? I don’t know! That’s your JOB! But you’re telling me, after months of funding and research, that you have discovered that the batteries WORK?!”

“Um…yes.”

“Perfect. Just perfect! We have to release our add campaign TOMORROW! Our designers have everything ready to go, and we can’t even offer them a decent, research supported tag line to entice customers! I should have listened to my mother and become an encyclopedia salesman…”

“Don’t give up hope, sir. I think I have a slogan that will do the trick.”

“Well it will have to, Jenkins. It’s all we’ve got.” 

Believe It or Not

Recently, I was inspired by a post my brother wrote on Facebook, and convicted to do the same, but instead post it on my blog. It has to do with something very important to me, but I don’t talk a lot about it:

My faith.

I consider myself a devout Christian. This is no surprise to many of you who know me. However, I rarely bring it up in talking with strangers or even friends who I didn’t go to Briercrest or church with. I’ve always found it hard to start those conversations, yet have no problem getting into spiritual and theological discussions once the initial topic has been brought up. So I guess I’m should probably start it for once.

Being a Christian means that I believe Jesus Christ was crucified on a cross for my sins, along with the rest of humanity, and rose three days later, confirming his victory over death and breaking its power over us. I believe that we have been saved from a very real place called Hell, where souls are sent to be punished eternally for sin, but I also believe in the place of Heaven where all those who have followed Jesus are taken for eternal rewards. I believe that all of this can be found in the Bible, and it is the recordings of people who were told by God and impacted by Christ. I believe everything written in this book is true, including the stuff that many people struggle to understand, such as Old Testament passages on genocide, homosexuality, polygamy and slavery. I believe that I have been placed on this Earth for a reason, which is to bring glory to God to all his people, and that I owe him my life and try to live for Him every day.

This is a really compressed version of my statement of faith. It is by no means comprehensive. To graduate from Briercrest, I wrote a 4 page document on what I believe. So I’ve had time to think about my choices and whether or not I’ve made the right decision, and I truly believe I have.

But why?

Why would I believe this stuff? Why would I commit my life to something that occurred over two millenniums ago, and that no one can seem to prove today? Why would I believe in something that some people so strongly fight against and claim that it’s completely insane?

Why not?

Why wouldn’t I want to follow the Creator of the universe? If everything in the Bible is true, and I have faith that it is, then we have been given the greatest opportunity in history in following Him. He promises us rewards beyond our wildest imaginations, love that cannot be comprehended by humans, and destruction to our enemies. And all we have to do is believe in Him. That seems like a pretty low-risk/high-reward deal.

There are a lot of other things I could get into, but I feel that this isn’t the place for them. If you’d like to continue the discussion, feel free to contact me via facebook or email or my face or whatever. If there’s any glaring omissions or confusions, then also please let me know so I can clarify myself. Being a Christian is not my religion; it is who I am. In everything I do, God will always come first, and I hope that He also will for you, too.

 There’s a verse in Joshua (24:15) that I would like to end on:

“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods of your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living. But for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

               

May God bless every one of you richly,

Dayton Reimer

A Letter to Snow

Dear Snow,

First off, let me say welcome back! I hope you enjoyed your summer vacation up North, but I’m glad you decided to come back again this year, since we didn’t leave on the warmest of terms. It feels like ages since you’ve been around, and I’m glad we finally get to hang out again. I have so many things I want to do. Outdoor skating, skiing, snowmen…do you wanna build a snowman?

But before I get carried away, I want to get some things straight, which is why I’m writing this letter in the first place. See, last year, when you came to visit, there were some…issues. You didn’t leave on a great note last year. You managed to anger most people I know. And I’d like to prevent that this year.

The first thing is you can’t overstay your welcome. I know, this sounds a bit cold, but you gotta get used to that. You came around November, and suddenly it’s April and you’re still crashing in the back yard. That’s not going to happen this year. I know times are tough, that it’s getting warmer everywhere and you’re finding fewer places you’re comfortable hanging out, but that’s not my problem. That’s just the inconvenient truth. There have been several times where you’ve ruined my plans with Spring because you’re still here and I have no place for him to stay.

Speaking of Spring, stop being such a jerk to him. Before you get all icy with me, just listen. Last year, I go and visit some friends down in Moose Jaw at the end of April. Spring had tagged along, though he was still warming up to the area. Then, when I go to drive home the next day, you push him out of the car and just exploded. Seriously, you were everywhere. At one point, you sat on the hood of my car and I could barely see the road. You kept going on about how you were so much cooler than Spring. And that’s not the only time. He’s a nervous wreck now. It’s like you leave just long enough for him to think it’s safe to come and visit again, then you jump out from behind the bushes and just pummel him. Last I heard, he’s in counselling. You’ve got to get along better with him.

And this year, let’s cool it with the mood swings. When you arrive, you’re always light and happy. You get a bit brisk, but that’s just who you are. I’ve gotten used to it. Then, all of a sudden, you get really bitter and heavy. Everything is dark and gloomy, and you won’t let me go anywhere to hang with other people. You get these really bad temper tantrums, sometimes just turning off the power because, “nobody like me anymore!” Did you take my advice and go to a doctor? It really seems like it might be schizophrenia. It got really bad last year when they were calling you “The Polar Vortex.” That was the worst I’ve seen of you in a long time. After the nasty temper tantrums, you get really cold and won’t talk to anyone. People freeze just being in the same area as you. I know people can suck, but you got to warm up to them a bit. Most people are really quite nice.

Anyways, those are the big things I wanted to address. Like I said, I’m really looking forward to chilling with you this year and I hope our time will be well spent. If you don’t tell the others, you’re really my favourite guest. Summer thinks she’s way too hot, and Autumn is depressed all the time. I think she might be sick, too. That much hair should not fall out of a person. Spring is friendly, but he gets a bit too cheery sometimes. And he always brings Rain with him, and he’s just a major downer. I can’t deal with all the waterworks. But I’m ranting.

Welcome back, Snow.